i slept last night. really slept. my head hit the pillow and i was out. it was restful sleep and i woke up ready to wake up for the first time in weeks. the perceived problem of yesterday had faded by the evening and the weight was off my shoulders.

that's good stuff.

i always wonder what i was so worried about after the anxiety has passed. i was always that kid who was scared of something (rollercoasters, first day of school, ice-skating) only to realize that it wasn't that terrible once i went through it. and you know, i always say "i will remember this lesson next time," but for some things...some things i just can't do that. i get this idea in my head that if i let anyone else "win" that i have lost my self.

the only consolation i find is that the Wolf knows how to handle me. i make things complicated, i really do, but he knows how to take care of me.