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i dreamed the strangest things last night.
first, i was wandering through the high desert in Oregon, trying to hitch a ride back to Portland. i don't know how i got there or why i was without a car in the first place, but the only person who stopped was this woman driving a tandem tractor trailer. as it was very cold and i was very tired of walking, i hopped into the cab.
we drove along and i realized that she reminded me of Pat from the SNL skits. after a little while, i noticed that she was driving very fast for conditions. i asked her to please slow down. she pushed her glasses back on her nose and said that she knew what she was doing. as she careened around curves and down steep grades, i started yelling for her to let me out. she told me to calm down and that she had driven this route a million times. as she said that, the semi jack-knifed and started sliding down the highway, toward a cliff. i started screaming "you've killed us! you've killed us!"
the truck went off the cliff, crashing down the mountain. i felt nothing, the world went white.
next thing i know i'm home again in my apartment. i get off the bed and walk into the living room and it's as if the wreck never happened. everyone i know is hanging out, drinking wine and chatting noisily. there's music playing. i greet a few people as they make their way through the crowded place.
i walk over to the Wolf and whisper, "what's going on?"
"Well, I was just about to open another couple bottles of wine, actually."
"no...what is everyone doing here?"
"We've been planning this party for a month. What do you mean?"
"tell me the truth...am i dead?"
laughter. "Darling! Dead?! Don't be silly. Your landlady doesn't care if we have a big party, she's right over there. Let's pick out some more wine to open."
the general consensus at the party is that i am, in fact, not dead. but all through the evening, i'm sick with the feeling that i have died in a horrible accident and that now i am just haunting everyone. my mother tells me that it's probably just deja vu. another friend says that i should probably not drink any more.
the whole sequence seemed so strange. usually when my dreams are frenetic and random, my dreamself takes it all in stride. this one just seemed so weird. perhaps because the first section was so traumatic. the Dream Analyzer on Swoon.com says that death is actually a good thing, symbolizing freedom from worries and illness.
note to self: never take rides from truckdrivers in the high desert. or maybe never drink Guinness and ginger ale so close to bed time.
Replies: 2
Hmmm...it sounds more like a loss of control to me. You put your life in someone else's hands, which freaked you out because she wouldn't drive the way you wanted her to. Then her recklessness caused the exact thing you feared all along--which was flying over the cliff. You've been so into the wine and that kind of socializing lately, maybe the party was your subconscious idea of happiness--where your brain would send your soul were you to actually lose control and fly over a cliff. Or maybe I'm full of shit. At any rate, thanks for the drunk dial!
Posted by Megan @ 03/21/2004 07:43 PM EST
carl jung on dream interpretation: it is impossible to look at the symbolism of a dream seperately from the psyche of the dream. He would suggest that rather than looking up what death means to other people, think about what death means to you. sit down and write about your dream again writing down every detail, color, texture, taste...anything that you remember. then go back to all of these things and the more overt symbols (death being a major one in this case) and brainstorm about each one. What does this thing make you think of. Write down everything that comes into your mind, when you've done this for all of it go back and look over it as a whole, see if then the dream means anything more to you.
I've only done this once, mostly because I have very little problem interpreting my dreams, but the minute that I sat down to do so it all made sense. I highly recommend it.
Cheers, Meg
Posted by megily @ 03/20/2004 11:57 PM EST
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